Mileka smiles in the arms of Jesus

I tend to post the facts, details, the happenings, the honest truth. That's just me. I am however, a very emotional person, and things tend to get to me right down to my core at times. It can be the simplest of things, or it can be the most difficult things. My faith has gotton me through life thus far and keeping God the center of my life is always a comfort to me and will guide me through everything life throws my way. Recently I was struck right in the center of my heart with the news of Hannah's friend and her unexpected death.

It was an accident, a four wheeler accident. A 9 year old girl died. She was Hannah's friend and a friend to many, loved by many. Her name is Mileka.

You may have heard her name here and there when we talked about Hannah's friends. Hannah met her in Kindergarten, Mrs Allen's class. It didn't take long before these two girls clicked. Hannah was on the quiet side and Mileka at first was too. They laughed and giggled alot together, they made each other smile, learning what a friendship is. I remember the day Hannah came home and told me she made a friend, her name was Mileka. I had never heard that name before. Hannah said she has a Hawaiian name. Her mom is from Hawaii. Soon after, I found out Mileka's mom, JoAnna, is a first grade teacher at Dassel Elementary. Those were just the beginnings of a new found friendship.

The news of Mileka's death reached me on Sunday May 8th, 2011, of all days Mother's Day. After church I came home with Bailey, and Steve and Hannah went with Grandma Nancy to go get her camper out of storage in Grove City.

I finished eating my lunch and went on Facebook. I saw a status posted online I will never forget. It was a status from JoAnna. I initally saw Mileka's picture as her profile picture and then my eyes went to some recent posts from friends saying about how sorry to hear about the accident, I kept scrolling, WHAT HAPPENED!??! Who got hurt?? I said those words out loud and that got Bailey's attention. He came over to the computer, as I kept scrolling down, further on her Facebook page and came to her post that they lost their dear sweet Mileka last night due to injuries from a ATV accident. OMG!! NO NOT MILEKA, I screamed.
I remember that feeling like it was yesterday. The pure disbelief, the shock, the sick feeling in my stomach, the tears, the thoughts of why? I just couldn't grasp the facts. I read all the comments from friends and family and just couldn't control any emotions, I felt sick. Hannah's dear sweet friend that was always there for her and made her smile and laugh, her dance buddy...they had such a promising future together, so many plans for the future. She is now gone and all the memories forever in our minds.

Hannah and I had just talked a few weeks before, about how since Mileka wasn't in her classroom this year, dance was the most time they spent together, that we would have to make a it a point to get the girls together to just play, more often this summer.

It was a tough discovery when Hannah found out last summer that Mileka was going to be in a different classroom to begin 3rd grade, they've always been together. Dance would be their thing together though, and we were glad for that. Hannah wanted to start dance so bad with Mileka and couldn't hardly wait for the fall. They had a wonderful dance year together and I'm so glad that because of Mileka, Hannah discovered her love of dance with Just for Kix. Without hesitation, Hannah has stated she will continue to dance because Mileka would want her to. I will always see Mileka beside Hannah when I see her dance.

I had the tough job of telling Hannah about her friend when she got back home with daddy and grandma. I was a crying mess, still in shock. When I told her, she cried and I believe said the word "no", in her softest voice. It was heartbreaking. We sat on the couch a just hugged for about an hour. I said some things to her.....I told her Mileka was in a accident on a four wheeler and wasn't wearing a helmet, she hit her head and it caused her to die, BUT she is with Jesus in heaven, which is the best place ever. We will see Mileka again some day when we go to heaven. She is happy and in no pain and she would want you to be happy too. Remember all the good times you both had and never forget her. We will miss her and be sad, and that's ok.

I remember a piece of advice JoAnna had for our family when Steve lost his dad, and the kids their grandpa...."never forget the memories and always keep his memory alive by taking about him often".....we try to keep grandpa's memory alive and will do the same for Mileka.

The next week was the toughest, going back to school on Monday, the memories, the loss, the sadness. Dassel Elementary had counselours and pastors there to help when needed. They kept up with the daily routine and everything went smoothly. The kids made projects remembering their friend and classmate. They all wore bright pink ribbons for Mileka, her favorite color. Her classroom is painting a chair in her memory-- zebra print and pink, that will stay as a reminder in the classroom of her personality...always smiling, always happy, always bright.

On Thursday that week was the funeral in Silver Lake. They lived in Silver Lake, but since Mileka's mom was a teacher at Dassel, that is where Mileka travelled to school each morning with her mom. We went to the funeral home early for a visitation and we were able to give the family some visable support. I gave JoAnna the biggest hug ever. I will never forget that moment. Her daughter was laying in a small pink casket behind us, and the flowers were abundant. We cried and no words were needed. We felt the support and emotion of the day. We walked up to see Mileka and it was pretty overwhelming. The soft hawaiian music in the backround, the smell of flowers, and the little girl whose life was taken too soon. She didn't look much like herself, which was the hardest to see, but she had a very beautiful life with many that adored her. She was even wearing "silly bands" and that brought a smile to my heart. (ie: silly bands are rubber bracelets that are popular with the kids that are shaped in different shapes/characters, but when worn on the wrist just look like a squiggly bracelet).

The funeral service was very touching and brought comfort and reassurance. After the service it was raining, raining tears, I suppose. Coming out of church Hannah got a big hug from her 2nd grade teacher, Mrs Ganser, in which both her and Mileka were in her classroom. It was comforting to see.
We didn't stay for the burial, mostly cause of the rain, and Hannah had to use the bathroom and her blood sugar (unknowingly at the time) was in the 400's. We forgot to bolus for breakfast during the prepartions for the funeral,so when she tested we were a little shocked and glad we came home.

I found out they let a bunch of balloons go into the sky at the cemetary. They were bright pink, light pink and black and it was told that only the bright pink ones floated up high and disappeared..... those were the ones Mileka wanted.

Life goes on. JoAnna and Kyle and 2 older sisters (Brianna and Ashley) misses their "Leka Lu" so bad, we all do. A parents pain in this situation must be almost unbearable....but JoAnna has shown much strength. She has a very strong faith, and also believes Mileka is keeping her strong and would want her to be strong. She is back at school teaching those little 1st graders and finishing out the year, and gaining strength from her Dassel family...it doesn't get easier though.

Hannah has been doing well and even though she had a tough few weeks internally with porcessing her feelings and managing her diabetes, externally she has been happy and enjoying life with her friends. I think she treasures each one a little more than before. Her friends mean the world to her.


2nd grade field trip to the MN Zoo (age 8 1/2)
Hannah is way in the back and Mileka is the one one the left in front.


Hannah and Mileka climbing to the top of the tree house


Hannah and Mileka watching the seals


group picture at the Zoo


1st grade field trip to the Children's Museum ( age 7 1/2)




Hannah went to Lake Stella with Mileka's family the summer of 2009-- (age 7 1/2)




Como Zoo-- Kdg. field trip (age 6 1/2)



Hannah's 7th birthday swimming party


Hannah's 8th Birthday party


Hannah's 9th Birthday party

Bailey n Baseball--GO CHARGERS

Baseball has been in full swing for quite awhile now for Bailey. This year he was able to be on a 7th grade team during the school year for about 4-5 weeks mid April to mid May. The 7th graders were divided up into 2 teams, about 24 kids total played. They practiced every day after school, which took a little getting used to, having to go pick him up every night between 5-5:15pm. They travelled to a couple close cities like Waconia & Watertown, and then had a few games on the home field as well. It was a good season and he had alot of fun getting into baseball mode again.

It was good practice, as the summer season has already started now. Again there are two 7th grade teams divided up pretty evenly. They have already had a game in which they played the other DC team on Tuesday night. The score was 3-4 in 8 innings (only supposed to play 7, I think). It was tied so they played it out, and Bailey's team lost in the end. Then they were off to play one of Delano's two teams yesterday, and they won like 12-3. So off to a pretty good start. There are plenty of games this summer to keep him busy.

Here are some pictures of his first game in Cokato vs the other DC 7th gr. team on Tuesday night


Bailey batting



Bailey on base and ready to go


coulda been a cool pic of him sliding into home to score ...but all I got was his feet.


Playing playing 2nd base.

the ball says it all

pumping anniversary

May 6..it's been a full year that Hannah has been on the insulin pump. I remember all the classes we had to attend before we could even start. Hannah was so nervous to do something different. We were all a little scared of the unknown. We knew, however, that this was the next step for her, and it will improve things. It was a pretty drastic change and more information to pack into our brains. The pump has made our lives with diabetes easier (if there is an easier), and for Hannah her health has directly been affected by it's benefits.
She doesn't need to get injections with a syringe anymore, which was often times inconvienient, hurt and caused stress each time, it was more often than not inaccurate, therefore affecting her blood sugars, therefore affecting her mood.
We did the best we could for her, and her A1C was holding pretty steady at about 8.1-8.6%, which indicates a 3 month average of blood sugars in the high 200's. Not good.
The pump allowed her A1C to come down to an amazing 6.6% , which is a 3 month average blood sugar in about the 170's.

Here is the chart that breaks down hgb A1C. As you can see she is now in the goal range. As you look at the chart you can see how far we have come...at diagnosis she was at 10.8%, which means the 3 months prior to diagnosis her blood sugars were mostly in the 300's and higher, and since we were not doing anything to treat that, that was happening on a daily basis. On December 3, 2008, her blood sugar was 560. We have come a long way.



The pump has been able to give her more precise dosing. It doses to the 10th of a unit where as with injections, we were doing a full unit or a half....it was our only option. Even drawing up insulin to the half of a unit was a task in itself.

So her blood sugars are showing improvement, her moods have been better, and we get through this together and with more of a smile.

Every 2-3 days she gets her infusion site changed. It's the area where the pump connects to her body. Insulin is delivered to her just under the skin where a cannula is placed ("her site"). It's similar in design to a IV cathater, where a needle is inserted and then pulled out and left in place under her skin is a small cannula. This has been the worst of having the insulin pump, it's doing an IV prep every 3 days. Hannah has struggled with this the most. We have a process that we go through and it takes about 45min - 1 hr to change her site. Technically it should take less than 10 minutes. Right from the beginning , when we were at the pump start class, the infusion set choosen for her was the "Silhoette", because she is so thin. It goes in at a 45 degree angle just under the skin, and they put numbing cream on her so it didn't hurt so much. We have stuck with the numbing cream since it makes it easier on her. Most kids can get by with the "quick sets" and that goes in at a 90 degree angle, which is straight down and in and goes in with a push of a button-- ie: quick. Hannah's sites we have to manually insert. You need to have a little more fatty areas with the quick sets so that the cannula doesn't kink and not allow insulin in. Medtronic has just come out with a NEW "quick set" called the "Mio" and it has a shorter needle and cannula. Sometime this summer we are gonna try this one out. Hannah again, is not for change. Being that it's a quick set I think it's another thing that will make these site changes easier for us as parents and hurt less for Hannah. Also Steve has not yet done a site change in the entire year. That means I have done approximetly 150 site changes over the last year. I just started to teach Steve, but Hannah gets all worked up when I'm around and wants me to do it.
He just did his first one today, while I went to workout and it went just fine, and if we get going with the new Mio's this summer hopefully it will be easier and quicker for the summer, and even in a few years Hannah will be doing her own sites.

Also coming up, we will be walking in the JDRF 5K Walk to Cure Diabetes in Neenah WI on May 21st. Any support would be appreciated....donations can be made online: www.walk.jdrf.org, under team Hannah's Hopeful Hearts--(Hannah Emery) or checks can be mailed to us. Every walker, every step, every dollar brings JDRF closer to a cure.

Easter time--Jesus is Risen, He is Risen indeed!!

Just a few pictures from Easter. We didn't have much planned this year. Kids sang a song in church with sunday school, and I had to work at the hotel at 4pm that night.






The sun was bothering Hannah's eyes, no matter where we went.......SO....


...to get a good picture of her she had to be under a tree.


Easter eggs

wild boy turned couch potato

Our dog Lou, (AKC name "Bailey's Captian Lou"), turned 9 years old on April 23. According to Hannah's recent independant research on dog breeds, she discovered Golden's live 10-12 years, and she wasn't too happy that Lou is now 9 already.
Our fluffy, energetic wild boy has traded in those times, for naps on the couch all day.





He does still gets bursts of energy, but are mostly short lived. He loves to wrestle with Steve in the livingroom, and instead of long walks on the path in town, he now enjoys the quick jaunts to the local coffee shop with Steve. The jingle of his collar and leash still gets him all riled up.
He will tear around the yard like the wild boy he used to be, but it only lasts a few short minutes now before he needs a rest and a drink. He will still retrieve a ball or frisbee, but only a few times and then he just stands and looks. Escaping out of the backyard used to be his goal, but not anymore. If he does spot free range of Dassel, he now just ventures across the street to visit the neighbors, instead of his escapades trying to figure out how to get to Cokato ( 6 miles away!!!)and then looking at us like--see ya later. One time he landed in the dog pound, because he got out without his collar on, we all learned a expensive lesson. He loves to lounge in the sun, as long as it's not too hot and spends most of the summer outside on the back step, sleeping the day away. Winter is not his favorite season.....snow up to his back is hard to get through.



Spring is definatly not my favorite season when he comes in all muddy.

His fur is pretty white now, and has been turning white over the last several years. He is our version of a white golden :)
He has truly been a wonderful first dog for our family and we enjoy him in our lives (most of the time)

The dignity and grace of our canine friends are amazing to me.
We humans have so much to learn from them,
Such an uneven exchange...such a small price they demand from us.
A little food and water, a little attention
and a corner in which to sleep.
In return, we get volumes of unconditional love,
patience, understanding, and loyalty.
If only the human race could unlock their secrets.
(author unknown)

Pictures of Lou on his birthday.

He's pretending to be an old man ( ha ha)